In a recent women’s step study meeting, a young woman with two years of sobriety shared that she was struggling emotionally – feeling overwhelmed, untethered and alone. She was looking for a new job and had begun a new medication regimen in the hopes of feeling better. She also shared that she felt the fragility of her emotions had heightened ever since she had increased her commitment to meditation. She wondered if this practice was bringing up some unresolved issues. She stated that snippets and feelings from her past traumas were surfacing, and she asked for help in deciphering all of this.
It wasn’t until the end of the meeting as we were closing up, that I realized that no one had addressed her questions or offered counsel. As it was a warm, slightly breezy evening, we decided to walk and talk. She shared that she had significant losses a few years ago – specifically with the death of a close friend and two immediate family members. She wondered if she had really allowed herself to grieve, given the timing of the deaths and her work and family responsibilities. We discussed the symptoms of PTSD and the four components of her recovery: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. She stated that walking felt nurturing to her and she expressed interest in actually using the gym membership she had been paying for.
Years ago, she had found art as a great way to improve her mental concentration – she found that the detailed work helped her focus and problem-solve. Emotionally, she acknowledged that the prescribed medicine changes were indeed helping her move in the right direction to safely access and process the emotional intensity of a succession of traumatic deaths in her inner circle. Deep in her spirit, she knew that her increased meditation practice was healthy – even though it was bringing up uncomfortable emotions. She vowed to continue strengthening the conscious contact she was developing with her God.
By the end of our walk, she seemed to stand taller – her shoulders squared and a smile on her face. When she looked at where she was – via the lens of the four pillars of healing – she felt stronger and more assured that she could safely work through the emotions that remained with her therapist. A plan was in place – she just needed a shoulder and a sounding board.
Chaplain Deb Wacker, MDiv, MBA, BCCC, FHPC
She has expertise in ER/ICU trauma chaplaincy, palliative care and spiritual counseling. Chaplain Deb has provided spiritual care and counseling for the primary and secondary trauma victims, families and staff for two mass casualty incidents in Virginia.